Saturday, May 22, 2010

The "M" word


To whomever is reading this, I have not forgotten about this blog, but rather have not had Internet service due to the "M" word. I think it is a thing that should be outlawed, forbidden or something. This "something" is moving! The older I get the more crap I seem to own and the more exhausted I am for doing it. I am a very organized person. I do not work well in chaos. My life works for me when there is order. Right now my life is in a box. That is the phrase of the week. "Where is (insert your own words)..." My generic response is "In a box". God knows where or when I will find it but I seem to keep finding things that I don't want and should have dumped years ago. The things I need (insert your own words) I haven't got a clue where they are and right now I am too pooped to make a real effort to find them. So I change my underwear and trudge on. I have marks on my arms that may make my new neighbors think that I am a spousal abuse victim, but after seeing my husband and his bruises makes me laugh. What they must think of me!

Each day starts a half hour earlier, as I am not a morning person I must tell you- really SUCKS! but for 3 days last week I got to carpool with my husband. That was rather cool. Each night we pick a couple of things that are on the "must do" list and get them done, right before we fall into bed exhausted. Remember morning comes a half hour earlier. UGH...

I just today got Internet service, but no mailbox key to get the mail. I need to re update my info to show my new address and city. The thought of that makes me want to crawl under the covers and hide! LOL You forget who all has your address until you have to resubmit it all again. I know it will all come in time but there is another aspect of my personality I forgot to mention, I have no patience! I want it all done yesterday...

Sunday, May 9, 2010

Mother's Day?


Today is Mother's Day. When I was a kid this was the best day of the year. My mom and I were best of friends, always there for one another. I would always give my gift way too soon and would use that excuse to give her more. She always gave me more and then some. Now that she is not here, I hate this day and cannot wait for it to be over. I know it is selfish, but today reminds me of what I miss. I miss my her. During my teenage years, I swore I would never be like my mom but now I know I am my mother and I carry on her legacy and that's pretty OK with me.

I haven't carried a child inside my body or labored to push one out into the world. Its not that I don't like kids, but I don't think I really have the patience for them. Does that make me a bad person. I don't think so, a responsible one eh maybe. I do have patience for the lost souls that others do not want or have recklessly discarded. The zoo which I lovingly call it, consists of fish, birds, bearded dragons, turtles, ferrets, cats and a dog. They rely on me to care for them, protect them and guard them from harm. In their eyes I am their parent. I do what is best for them, love them unconditionally and let them carve out a piece of my heart. Am I a Mom? You betcha. Do I deserve to celebrate this day. Some would say no, but I would have to ask the zoo, they say "Mother's Day?" Every day with her is Mother's Day. I love you critters...

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

I fell in Love on a Saturday Morning...




I am not person who "loves" everything. I am jaded and pragmatic and the older I get, the more cranky and inpatient I have become. But there is one area in my life that I seem to open my heart and flourish. Animals. I am an avid animal person. I hate the thought of people treating animals like they are possessions to be disposed of when times are tough or they don't fit into your lifestyle. Most of my "zoo" which I like to call it is full of pets that others did not want. They have a home with me for as long as their lifespan or as long as I can still afford to keep them all. I am in the middle of getting ready to move and my house is figuratively in disarray but the critters will all go with us when we move.

Saturday we headed to the Doo Dah Parade (more on that in another post). The person sitting next to us had a beautiful dog named Daisy. I had planned on just saying hi and letting it go, but this adorable dog was there for a reason. She was 3 years old and had recently been adopted by this man 10 weeks ago after being shuttled through 7 homes. Oh yeah did I say SEVEN homes! She had been abused and her ACL in her knee was out and she would need surgery. One look into her brown eyes and I was a goner. The man was trying to introduce her to new sights and sounds. She was scared and unpredictable. The street vendor who was selling hats and horns tried to pet her and she didn't like him. The owner said she didn't like men much. She loved Brendan and I. She could smell our rescue dog Sam (again another post) and I would hold my palm out so she could lick my hand. That seemed to calm her down. There were kids and clowns and basset hounds and wiener dogs. She would shake in fear and anticipation, but she was very well behaved.

Had the owner offered to me I would have without a doubt taken her home in a second. My heart was hers on Saturday Morning and when I think of her now my eyes tear up. After the parade, I sat on the curb and whispered sweet nothings to Daisy while the man gathered up his chairs and Daisy's water bowl. I said my last goodbyes and the man thanked us for making Daisy's day at the Parade a less stressed one. She was the one that made my day a less stressed one, by allowing my heart to open and have her come into my life for a brief time. Thank you Daisy, you will always have a home in my heart. Thank you for reminding me that I do have a heart and I am still capable of love at first sight on a Saturday morning.


Sunday, May 2, 2010

Here we go again!


I thought I wanted my ramblings and my dreams to be included in one blog. I have found out that that isn't what I really want. Originally my first blog White Tiger Diva was very exciting. Full of daily rants and odds and ends here and there. Then I had an "aha" moment where I wanted to post my work on the web for all to see. That's when things started to get jumbled.

So time has passed and I have decided to let White Tiger Diva showcase my beaded artwork and the Music Box to showcase - well me! I will post photos of my work both beaded and miscellaneous but also to let this place be where I can release the tunes that rattle around my head. So kids here we go again. I will be posting more than I have in the past and I hopefully will find better mental health for it, but don't count on it! After all, I am well still ME!